September, 2016

Fathering a teenager

Excerpt From: J. D. Vance. “Hillbilly Elegy.” HarperCollinsPublishers, 2016-04-30.

Lindsay was a teenager when Papaw died, at the height of that weird mixture of thinking you know everything and caring too much about how others perceive you. Papaw was many things, but he was never cool. He wore the same old T-shirt every day with a front pocket just big enough to fit a pack of cigarettes. He always smelled of mildew, because he washed his clothes but let them dry “naturally,” meaning packed together in a washing machine. A lifetime of smoking had blessed him with an unlimited supply of phlegm, and he had no problem sharing that phlegm with everyone, no matter the time or occasion. He listened to Johnny Cash on perpetual repeat and drove an old El Camino—a car truck—everywhere he went. In other words, Papaw wasn’t ideal company for a beautiful seventeen-year-old girl with an active social life. Thus, she took advantage of him in the same way that every young girl takes advantage of a father: She loved and admired him, she asked him for things that he sometimes gave her, and she didn’t pay him a lot of attention when she was around her friends. To this day, being able to “take advantage” of someone is the measure in my mind of having a parent.

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The Teenage Brain by Frances E Jensen MD

limbic system (the emotional center of the brain)
cerebellum
occipital lobe (vision)
temporal lobe (emotion, sexuality, language)
parietal lobe (movement, sensation)
frontal lobe (judgment, insight, impulse control)
hippocampus (memory processing)
amygdala (controls our most primal feelings – fear, anger, hate, panic, grief)
melatonin (hormone which induces sleep)

Ch 1 Entering the Teen Years
– When it comes to hormones, remember that the teenage brain is “seeing” them for the first time
– Puberty causes the concentration of sex hormones (which are present throughout childhood) to dramatically change; Estrogen and progesterone effect mood
– Sex hormones are active in the limbic system, which is the emotional center of the brain
– The hormone THP, usually released in response to stress to modulate anxiety, has a reverse effect in adolescents, raising anxiety

Ch 2 Building a Brain

– Brain matures from back to front – cerebellum, occipital lobe (vision), temporal lobe (emotion, sexuality, language), parietal lobe (movement, sensation), frontal lobe (judgment, insight, impulse control)
– The teen brain is about 80% mature; that 20% explains mood swings, impulsiveness, lack of concentration, adventure
– Process is not finished by the end of the teen years; college years are vulnerable as well
– stuff their minds with real stories, real consequences
– hippocampus is the brains workhorse for memory processing – used for encoding and retrieving memories
– an immature amygdala contributes to adolescent explosiveness

Ch 3 Under the microscope

– insight – which arises in the frontal and prefrontal lobes – depends on the ability to look outside oneself

Ch 4 Learning – A job for the teen brain

– Teen brains are learning at peak efficiency, still much else is inefficient, including attention, self-discipline, task completion, and emotions. The mantra “one thing at a time” is useful to repeat to teens; don’t overwhelm them
– Encourage teens to stop and think about what they need to do and when they need to do (instructions, directions, etc); it will increase blood flow to the brain areas involved in multitasking and slowly strengthen them.
– write instructions down as well as orally, and limit to one or two points (not 3 to 5).
– Encourage organization (calendars) on a regular basis
– Keep tabs on homework and digital time; the more you do, the fewer the temptations, and the more their brain will learn how to do without distractions
– count to 10 to stay calm before responding to your teen
– Be truthful – “you’re being irrational or impulsive or overly sensitive, and let me tell you why it’s your brain’s “fault””
– Teens have the capacity to modify and the responsibility to modify their own behavior
– Different areas of the brain process positive information; negative information is centered in the prefrontal cortex (which is not fully developed). This means that teens have less ability to process negative information, so they are more inclined to do something risky and less inclined to learn from the mistake

Ch 5 Sleep

– Memory and learning are consolidated during sleep, which is why sleep is vital
– Average teen requires 9.25 hours of sleep
– Beginning around the age of 10-12 a teens biological clock shifts forward. Melatonin, a hormone which induces sleep, is released two hours later at night in teens. It also stays in their system longer, thus the sleepiness in the morning.
– During puberty deep sleep decreases by as much as 40%
– Sleep gives the brain time to convert what’s been learned into memories
– Sleep deprivation inhibits the synaptic pruning or prioritization of information
– teens who use their cell phone after “lights out” had reduced time asleep and have increased risk of mental health disorders
– Poor sleep results in skin conditions, increased sport injuries
– When they come home from school ask how much homework they have and help them to prioritize
– Computers should be turned off an hour before bedtime to relax the overstimulated eyes and brain
– 2 hours on a digital LED device suppresses melatonin ~22%, negatively effecting sleep
– suggest they do non-tech activities before bed, and do the same activities at the same time each night to habituate the body to winding down at the same time each night
– The bed should be just for sleeping; avoid associations with eating or TV or even homework

Ch 6 Taking Risks

– Underdeveloped frontal cortex means they have trouble seeing ahead or understanding the consequences and are ill equipped to weight the relative harms of risky behavior
– Teens are very vulnerable to the power of suggestion
– Teens are not irrational; their reasoning abilities are more or less fully developed by the time they are 15
– Teen brains get more of a sense of reward than adult brains; the release of and response to dopamine is enhanced for teens
– But since the frontal lobe are still only loosely connected to other parts of the brain, teens have a harder time exerting cognitive control over dangerous situations
– Teens have to put much more effort into staying away from risks
– Adults are better at learning from mistakes due to their developed anterior cingulate cortex, which acts as a behavioral monitor
– Gratification is at the heart of a teens impulsivity
– Without a fully myelinated frontal lobe to provide inhibition, this can drive risk taking behavior
– It’s not the monetary reward, but simply the expectation of a reward that sets the nucleus accumbens buzzing
– Teens are hyper-sensitive to dopamine, so even small rewards if they are immediate trigger greater nucleus accumbens activity than larger, delayed rewards
– Help teens visualize the costs versus the benefits through an analogy
– Socializing with friends or playing sports has a protective value in keeping teens out of risk taking trouble

Ch 9 Pot

– THC (pot) disrupts the development of neural pathways
– Pot can change the receptors in different areas – hippocampus and cortex, resulting in changes of cognition; but also in the nucleus accumbens, which can increase the “addictability” of the brain to other substances
– Fear of losing a parent’s trust and respect is the greatest deterrent to drug use

Ch 11 Stress

– Since teenagers can’t smooth things out with their frontal lobe, it’s up to parents to provide a sense of calm that teens can’t yet provide themselves
– Emotional lives of all humans are closely tied to the amygdala, which controls our most primal feelings – fear, anger, hate, panic, grief. There is much less activity in the teen frontal lobe making it harder to handle emotions
– Teens amygdala are under less control by their frontal lobes, and therefore they will respond with more extreme emotions

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