Annika

In Nov 2006, when Annika was 3.5 years old, we enrolled her in “My Playground”, which was the precursor to Truckee Gymnastics. At home Annika was already physical and gifted. Annika flourished at My Playground, and was always committed to working hard and having fun.

Gym Camp @ 6 years old

Gym @ 8 years old

Around the summer of 2011 “My Playground” moved to a larger building, and formally added gymnastics (now called Truckee Gymnastics). Annika was so happy, having a bigger gym with more opportunities. Annika @ 9; Gym camp @ 10; Annika @ 11.

Annika started competing at Level 4 when she was 11 in 2014; Gold Country in Grass Valley, Sept 2014 and Oroville in Feb 2015. In the Fall of 2014 Annika got to compete in the NorCal State championships in Oroville – what an accomplishment, and it just fed her passion for gymnastics.

At 12 she competed at Level 5, and continued the next year at level 5 at Spirit of the Flame. She did not compete in the Level 5 NorCal State Championships, mostly due to timing. She started Level 5 in the Fall of 2015, and did not score high enough to make the States Championships that Fall. By Spring of 2016 she scored high enough to be promoted to Level 7, whose Championships would not be until Spring 2017.

By the time she was 13 Annika was competing at Level 7; the competition season changed from Fall to Spring, and one of her thrills was to compete in Vegas.

At Vegas Annika earned a spot to compete at the NorCal State Championships in April 2017. However, 2 weeks before the meet she injured her ring finger during PE at school. For those two weeks she still went to practice, yet was unable to do much due to her finger injury. By the time States came, her finger felt better and Annika was excited to compete and to try and qualify for Regionals in SoCal.

It didn’t happen. She had a great floor routine, scoring 9.0. Her vault looked good, but her score was a low 8.4. An bars things went badly; gripping the bar was too painful with her finger, and she ended up in tears and with a score of 5. She had to pass on beam. The few days after States Annika would randomly break down in tears, so upset about how poorly she did, and not giving herself any slack due to the injured finger.

There were 2 nagging issues throughout her gymnastics career; one that Annika was aware of, one she was not.

The issue that Annika knew of concerned the facilities: while they were more than sufficient when Annika was 8, they were insufficient for a level 5 (or 7) gymnast. In particular, the floor was too small, and too hard.

In January 2016, right after a meet in Reno, Annika broke down and shared her disappointments. She wanted to work harder and proceed faster and be able to practice on a “real” floor. She decided she needed to move. We spent one day in Reno, looking at 5-6 different gyms. They were all huge – sometimes 4-5 times larger than Truckee, with more than one of everything (bars, beams, vaults, even floors). Driving to Reno would be difficult, but it seemed the right thing to do. Annika decided she liked Deltchev the best, so we went for one full practice. Annika ended that session on a cloud; the coaches were great, the girls were nice, the facilities amazing. Later that week we went for a second practice, and Annika turned 180 degrees: she wanted to return to Truckee. In the end I think it was the social factor; she missed Kira, Natalie, and Maddy. While I wasn’t that happy about the idea of driving to Reno 4-5 times a week, I was also not that happy about Annika returning to Truckee either. I knew that gymnastics was very important to her, and I also knew that Truckee was not going to get her there.

The one issue Annika did not know about concerned the viability of the competition team. From the start the team was small; and it never grew. Whereas other competitions teams had multiple coaches focusing on individual events, Truckee had a single coach (Michelle, then Christina) responsible for all levels (4,5,6,7) and all events. With on average 4 girls on the entire team, and no visible growth in the future, it didn’t look like the team could continue to exist.

Which brings us to today, April 3rd 2017, which is when Truckee announced that it will cease the competition team, and focus on Xcel. We told Annika last night, and it crushed her. The twins were so upset on behalf of Annika that they were a mess as well. Heartbreaking. It’s only been 3 days since her poor showing at States, so this news is a double blow.

I want so badly for her to continue; her options now are staying at Truckee with Xcel Diamond, or moving to a gym in Reno. I don’t know what she will decide, but I do think it’s important for her to continue gymnastics and chase her dreams which for a long time now has been to compete in gymnastics in College.

Truckee whet her appetite, but it was never going to be able to get Annika to where she wants to go; in particular, Annika has always been willing to work much more than what the Truckee team could provide.

Last Saturday Annika had a gymnastics meet in Reno; we all attended to support her.

Included in her registration was a gift coupon for a yogurt shop in the casino. After the meet Annika and I went to redeem the coupon, while Mama and the twins went to get the car. After buyingthe yogurt, I noticed three spoons in the cup; Annika explained they were for Niki and Britta.

This was her day, and she should have been distracted by everything going on. Regardless, she still remembered her sisters.

Annika is a special person, a class act, an amazing sister, and a beautiful person.

P.S. I’m not saying that Niki and Britta aren’t special, or amazing, or beautiful! They each have their own strengths, I’m just pointing out an anecdote demonstrating one of Annika’s strengths.

Annika is now competing in gymnastics at level 7; there are a number of new and difficult moves she now has to perfect. One of these, as an example, is the back hand spring on the beam. Annika is at the point where she can successfully do it, but only when her coach is spotting her; and barely spotting her at that. On the drive hope we talked about mental preparation; I’m not sure that this has been discussed in any depth at the gym, and I think Annika is at the point now where she needs to be aware of the importance of, and practice, mental exercises to get her ready for competitions.

This morning I found this link, to help introduce Annika to the idea and importance of your mental game. This will be the start of a new journey, beyond the physical realm. Some excerpts from that link:

Shannon Miller, an Olympic Gold Medalist in gymnastics, agrees that mental preparation is key to success—and she says she couldn’t have gotten to the Olympics on physical ability alone. “The physical aspect of the sport can only take you so far. The mental aspect has to kick in, especially when you’re talking about the best of the best,” she says. “In the Olympic games, everyone is talented. Everyone trains hard. Everyone does the work. What separates the gold medalists from the silver medalists is simply the mental game.”

Moceanu agrees. “I’ve seen so many gifted athletes not make it because they couldn’t handle the sport mentally. It’s such a huge part of gymnastics—really any sport once you get to a certain level. Only those with a strong mind are going to compete at a high level. Only those with a strong mind are going to win.”

Another link.

This week is Halloween, Annika’s now in 8th grade. A memory of mine came to me last night.

8th grade, St. John’s Lutheran, Napa. Class size was 13, 3 boys and 10 girls. Mark Zeller and Sean Scott had never appeared to be of interest to the girls in our class…which should have been good news for me, but since I was introverted and classmates with girls that (in most cases) I had known since Kindergarten, “dating” or having a girlfriend was foreign to me.

Halloween. Friday evening. 1976. School party. Dunking for apples, etc. Scott Young (my best friend, 7th grade) and myself are re-directed outside to the playground by some of the 8th grade girls – Sherri Lahei; Barbara Rose; Julie Greenwalt; a few others – once it was dark.

Spin the bottle (5-6 girls who are ready to explore; they brought a bottle! 2 boys who are clueless), truth or dare. From the start everyone selects dare. Every dare is to kiss so-and-so. While I hadn’t spent one second imagining a kiss with any of these girls, I was enthusiastic. Kissed every girl, numerous times, lips closed, lots of giggling. It was silly yet endearing, in retrospect. While I imagine it had to be somewhat clumsy and awkward, I don’t recall that at all.

My recollection may be off, but I recall riding my bike to school the next day, on a Saturday, going to the playground and trying to make sense of what happened. I didn’t quiet realize it, but I was different now. End of the chapter of complete innocence. I walked around the playground, around the basketball courts. The school which had been my own for 9 years felt different to me, a bit disorientating. But exhilarating.

I ask Annika now and then about boys. I don’t want to pressure her or make fun of her; rather, I want her to feel comfortable talking with me about her romantic feelings. Nothing yet. She is in Catalina this week for school; maybe there is an unused bottle there, being spun…

Saturday, 10/11/14, Annika and Andrea spend the evening listening to what I hope will be a motivational speech. It’s by a young lady who, when she was 14, sailed solo around the world.

Also that weekend we were helping a friend by taking care of their two kids. Niki played with Kylie, Britta played with Brock.

At night I lost the argument about sleeping arrangements, and thus put Niki and Kylie upstairs in the living room on the twins mattresses, and Britta and Brock downstairs in Annika’s bedroom. I knew Annika would be upset – it happens to rarely that we need her bedroom, but when it does she is wildly selfish and even rude about it.

Annika and Andrea come home from their evening, and Annika immediately throws the mother of all tantrums when she finds out her room is booked. She comes upstairs into our bed, and the tantrum continues. Ridiculous is an understatement.

I know she is tired (cross country race Friday, Soccer Saturday, then out late Saturday night), but in my mind my expectation is that Sunday she will wake up and eventually apologize for her outburst.

Sunday comes and no apology.

Annika’s behavior especially strikes me, since she just heard a talk by a young lady who was demonstrating how to act older than she is. Plus, a few weeks ago Annika and I had a conversation where I encouraged her to continually reflect on the things she does, things she says, and if they don’t feel right (maybe her acts were inspired by peer pressure) to take ownership of her actions and correct them where necessary (even if it’s only a simple apology).

6 days after this is a concert with Luke Bryan that Annika and I were intending to go to. I was really looking forward to this; could not wait to spoil Annika with a concert and my undivided attention. However, given the lack of an apology, I’ve decided to sell the tickets, and not go to the concert.

This is tough! I could just talk with Annika about her outburst, but I feel that at age 11 she needs to start taking responsibility for her actions, rather than continually be reminded. She needs to learn consequences.

And I HATE that I am the one to do this.

In January at Squaw after one of Annika’s ski races, she was upset and confided in me that she had made goals for herself with respect to ski racing and she didn’t appear to be making progress on them. Two things struck me at the time:

1. Her goals were fair, and for a 10 year old to even think about goals seemed surprisingly mature to me.

2. Until then I thought my goals were the only game in town. They were not that Annika do poorly, but that I not emphasize (or even encourage) the idea of results mattering. I would encourage Annika verbally, emphasize that she simply do her best and have fun, and show up race day ready to take pictures. But I had not yet done anything with respect to hardware (ski) support.

Annika mentioned how many of the girls carry (versus ski with) their race skis to the start, how their Dad’s are at the race start doing last minute waxing, etc. Thus far I had intentionally not done this, as I felt like it was prioritizing results over everything else. It was only now that I realized I needed to take Annika’s intentions and goals into consideration.

Fast forward to this past weekend, the final end of year Far West ski races at Sugar Bowl. Annika is on skis that have been tuned, she is carrying her race skis to the start, she is determined. The last race on the last day of the season, and Annika gets 14th place – achieving one of her goals of getting within the top 15.

I could not be more proud of Annika – for establishing fair goals, and persistently keeping after them. Go Annika!

I could (and should) write more about the beautiful examples of Annika’s daily demonstrations of empathy and consideration; but this is one example that must be noted.

Father’s Day weekend in 2013, and Mama has gone to Germany for her High School reunion, leaving Papa and the girls to enjoy some quality time. Sunday afternoon, with only a few hours left before Mama was to return, I playfully mentioned to the girls how this reunion would play out. All three girls would see their Mama and begin the race, with Annika getting there first. A twin (a kept in generic, although I was thinking Niki) would reach Mama second and push Annika out of the way. The other twin (obviously here I’m thinking Britta) would collapse in tears before reaching Mama. My point to the girls: let’s all be happy Mama is home, let’s not fight over her or get mad, and let’s make the reunion a positive event.

Flash forward those few hours and we are walking to the Train Station to meet Mama. We are at the bottom of the tunnel, and suddenly we see Mama at the top, walking towards us. All three girls bolt. And Annika is in first, by a wide margin. ~20 feet before reaching Andrea, Annika stops; she turns around; and she lets Niki and Britta pass her.

It was beautiful and heart wrenching at the same time. It was the essence of sacrifice.

Certainly one explanation as to how and why Annika acts these days is due to her still adjusting to a new school, new friends, new environment. But part of it is age, too (see Wonder of Girls cheat sheet, Stage 3). She’s hyper sensitive right now; the (daily) adjustments can throw her for a loop. Annika has met a friend next door, Sophia, who is 2 years older but they get along great. Still, when together I can see Annika acting more like a big girl (wanting privacy, etc). That’s all good; I just have to be there to support her. She’s more resistant now to boundaries than in Tahoe, but again that is the sensitivity. She does still want to please, to excel, to achieve. It’s work for all of us, but it’s good work.

An anecdote on a Dad’s inability to connect with his daughter…or, more simply, a male’s incompetence.

While hanging out with Annika in her bedroom, Annika showed me an Enemy list she’s compiled (with an invisible ink pen, which is pretty cool). We talked about each kid on her list, and I tried to understand how they have earned their ranking.

I tried to explain the difference between not liking someone, and someone being your enemy. In hindsight this is where the problem occurred; I should have just continued listening, limiting my questions, but I was determined to make this a teaching moment.

Annika, getting frustrated with me, now felt the need to argue her case, that each kid (she focused on Mia at this point) really deserved to be on the list. She ended up in tears, and despite my calm assurances she wanted to be in her room by herself.

Now, as if I hadn’t screwed that up enough, I go upstairs and tell Andrea what has just happened. While retelling the story Annika starts to come upstairs, hears me, and yells out that I’m not supposed to tell anyone.

She ceases to talk with me for a few hours. A few days later I find a note under her bed, where we were talking, which says out of frustration with her Papa “I hate everybote”.

I need to learn when to talk, when to listen, and when to cut my losses. Men really are from Mars.

Annika has been taking piano lessons for a few months now, after almost a year of her bothering us about it. It’s been impressive to watch; borrowing our neighbors electric piano, Annika has been self-motivated the entire time to rehearse and practice, without us having to manage the effort. Her progress – while it may be typical, who knows? – is still amazing to track. Her work thus far culminated in a piano recital last Friday. I am so proud of her…